Am I too Nice To Guys? The “I’m Too Nice” Myth

Am I too Nice To Guys? The “I’m Too Nice” Myth

I actually would mind heaps if the guy is too nice. He’s even freaking too nice if other girls throw themselves on him and he’s “too nice” to reject them so he ends up cheating on me? Hell no, I ain’t having nothing of that nonsense! Guy’s who don’t have morals are not nice guys. Genuine nice people, say ‘no’ to things that are wrong. It’s like a bully telling this ‘guy’ to hold their jacket for them, while he beat’s this kid up.

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I’m 26, single and, save for an amazingly brief relationship when I was 19, have been single all of my life. I seem to have no trouble making friends, male or female, and I am known to be a very personable, intelligent person. But somehow these qualities don’t seem to translate in the dating world. I’ve had plenty of male friends say “the guy who gets you is really lucky. So evidence suggests I’m a good person, but am I just not attractive enough to date?

I have the opposite problem.

Another example might be staying in an unhealthy relationship way past its expiration date because you feel bad hurting your partner or leaving.

In fact, I have a tendency to date d-bags. The ones that are arrogant. The ones that lie, cheat, and lie again. The ones that withhold affection in order to gain power. How could I know that I have the tendency to do exactly this and yet continue to dive headfirst and knee-deep into the highs that come with catching the one who saves his affections only for the women ready to believe him?

These men all share qualities that are not innately bad— in fact what makes these men appealing are the good qualities they all share: confident, outspoken, self-assured, aware. But in no time, he reveals that that confidence was truly arrogance and a lack of concern for others. The outspokenness a mask for unapologetic tactless, rude and inappropriate outbursts. The awareness a tool for understanding and manipulating his captive audience.

Well, women just like the challenge! Women inherently want to change, fix or save people!

Does being too nice hold you back in life?

That is until I met my current boyfriend. I was addicted to the games. I thought passion came in the form of fighting and tears. Fast-forward to today, and obviously, I was terribly wrong. I had my doubts in the beginning. But they did.

Date The Nice Guy because it makes us as women look stupid (and actually quite Guys who were too flakey and disrespected my time.

For myself, resentment is the death knell of a romantic relationship. Could it be that your expectations of how your guy will reciprocate to your niceness are getting in the way? Could it be that you give and give while expecting the law of reciprocation to catch you? To find out, pull back a bit. Stop the unsolicited gifts. Stop the little surprises. Stop doing whatever it is that is making you feel over-extended.

See if he notices. Just pull back and focus on yourself a little more. Nature abhors a vaccuum. Are you afraid? This will be telling as well.

Why you have to date the Nice Guy

The new site update is up! Is this guy just too nice for me to stomach? While our group was roaming around the city, the two of us walked a few paces behind the rest, absorbed in our conversation. I found him to be cute and smart, if maybe too nice and self-effacing.

7 Types Of Bad Men And Why You Keep Dating Them Overly-wishful thinking makes sense if it happens once with a guy you really like. But if this “They don’t think they’re as attractive or smart or nice as they actually are.

Instead, they just soak up all the nice treatment and then sleep with a guy who makes them feel how they really want to feel. What do women really want to feel when interacting with a guy? Keep reading to discover the answer. When a guy notices that a woman is reacting in a positive way to his nice behavior i. It feels good that the woman he likes is being nice to him, smiling and showing interest in talking to him. Hopefully she will develop feelings for me over time.

Why does she reject the nice guy when he tries to make a move on her? If you focus on being nice to a woman and end up being too nice to her, it simply creates feelings of friendly affection towards you, not sexual attraction. Read the dictionary definitions below to see the difference. Affection noun : A gentle feeling of fondness or liking. Attraction noun : A quality or feature of someone that evokes interest, liking or desire.

How To Stop Being The Nice Guy With These 7 Tips!

Women say they want the nice guy. But I’m not so sure. I recently had the following IM conversation with my friend Jill:. Poor Dave! He’s losing out to punks, bar tenders and rock stars!

Guess they’d rather date assh*les instead of giving a nice guy like me a Women have biological urges, too, and if a woman was fortunate.

So, here goes As anyone who follows this site knows well, waiting around is the exact OPPOSITE of what you want to be doing with women that is: moving faster with women , since attraction expires , and in any event Nice guys end up in the friend zone because they are fine with waiting, comfortable with it, and complain not when women shunt them into their man-queue After all, they have time Clearly, men are just shallow pigs.

Nice is the lowest common denominator. Being nice is a bare minimum requirement, NOT a shining, redeeming, rare, heroic quality. When life hands them lemons, they throw the lemons on the ground and scream at them. These guys are not boring, unsexy nice guys. There are many things that are actually under our control, but we as people tend to draw the wrong conclusions about what those things are and how much control we have over them — and this is often fueled by the information sources we surround ourselves with.

Yet, women keep ignoring the guys who take this path and chasing down the bad boys who make them cry — because those bad boys know how to advertise themselves to women. I have noticed that boring, unsexy nice guys tend to consume a large quantity of media, including news and anything pundit-related — sports commentary, stock market commentary, political commentary.

The New Nice Guy: How to date and be decent in 2020

This semester I got to know a very nice, very sweet guy who I ultimately decided not to pursue a relationship with. After a few months of talking I decided, for a number of reasons, not to continue dating him. Because that happens sometimes.

I work with so many men and women who don’t want to date someone who is “too nice” because they freak out at the thought of having real emotional intimacy.

I like to meet new people, go on dates and see where things go. With that being said, over the years, I have met a fair amount of guys who turned out to be the so-called textbook Nice Guys and as far as I remember, I have rejected them all. Before you get me all wrong, I would like to clarify and emphasize that I did not turn them down for being nice.

Personally, I can be sure that I want a great guy who shares all the fundamental values with me including being nice and kind to each other. I do look for meaningful connections. However, I turned the textbook nice guys down for a variety of reasons surprisingly that have nothing to do with them being nice but somehow have made the nice quality a turn-off. From the beginning of the dating process, these guys almost always leave the planning to me — what to do, where to go, what to eat and the list goes on and on.

It gets boring and exhausting really quickly for me.

Advice: Guys don’t want to date me. Am I too nice?

At the risk of sounding like your mother, I am going to make a strong case for why you have to date the Nice Guy. Not should. The Nice Guy. It is because it makes us as women look stupid and actually quite anti-feminist to not value what the Nice Guy brings to the table. Either way, his lack of killer instinct has acted as a turn-off.

Women say they want the nice guy. His worst showing of being too nice was when he was on a first date with a girl and he walked her into.

I just finished dating a nice guy. I found one! Surprisingly, it was a disaster. After a string of horrible relationships, I finally wanted to date someone who was just… nice. You know? Like, literally that was it. The long list of demands I used to have for a partner Brunette! Emotionally vulnerable but also mysterious! No Geminis!

Are you being too nice in a relationship? written by the Singlescoach® Nina Atwood

Sarah Schewitz Jul 17, 0 comments. Most of us have been taught the importance of being nice to others. We try to be helpful, supportive, and positive to those around us.

my friend said the bad thing about this guy is that hes too i have this friend. Shes like this really nice girl so i assume she would go for.

He outlines the three attachment styles as anxious, avoidant or secure. Anxious: craves intimacy, often preoccupied with relationships and longs to get closer with their partner. Avoidant: equates intimacy with loss of independence, distancing self, the idea that something better is around the corner. For example, if you have an avoidant attachment style, someone who is secure may turn you off.

You associate a calm attachment system with boredom and indifference, and because of this fallacy you may let the perfect person pass you by. By continuing to use this site, you agree to our updated Terms of Service and Privacy Policy. MadameNoire is a sophisticated lifestyle publication that gives African-American women the latest in fashion trends, black entertainment news, parenting tips and beauty secrets that are specifically for black women.

Give nice guys a chance

Because boring people are last in line when it comes to reproductive success. At least a selfish bitch might be selfishly exciting or at the very least; cause someone to have strong feelings about you. Have you ever noticed that some of the most selfish, crazy, egocentric or even arrogant people still have people gravitating toward them? By the way, a selfish person is rarely a selfish person with everybody. If you choose to pay attention I promise it will pay off.

That’s not how dating works! You want to find a man who treats you well from the start. Men don’t get “Nicer.” If Anna were to ask, “Am I too nice.

Is it possible to be too nice? What every man needs to know about the heart and mind of women. Is it even possible to be too nice? Men, the world over, have wondered why women continually pass up the quintessential nice guy who is loving, caring, giving, supportive, accommodating, faithful and head-over-heels in love with them. This unsolved mystery has stumped me for years until now. I have finally cracked the code. There are several contributing factors that place Nice Guys in dating purgatory.

In the initial stage of a relationship there are many men who try really hard to make women happy. In fact, they often bend over backwards to accomplish this task. If and when they enter into a deeper level of commitment , they often take things a step further. They begin to put their partner ahead of everyone and everything else in their lives. While this may seem to accomplish the goal of making her happy, it actually does the complete opposite.

In fact, if he centers his life around her, it will actually drive her away.

Why Does Being Too Nice to a Woman Often Lead to Rejection?


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